Sex Education For Children: When To Talk To Your Child About It?
Sexuality is an important aspect of your life, no matter how taboo it was as a general subject of discussion in previous generations.
Your child will see sexual messages all the time on television. What do you do? Do you pretend the subject doesn`t exist or do you provide the right information according to his/her understanding?
Today, the access to information offers the possibility to children to get in contact with it even from an early age and, that`s why one of the mandatory duties of the parents is to ensure that they have a proper sex education.
Sex education starts from the earliest moments of life. Before 2 years, a child might not be able to make sentences, but he`s already aware where his genitals are. He also discovers similarities with the same sex parent and knows that the parent of opposite sex is different.
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In these circumstances, don`t tell her: “it`s not nice to talk about your penis or vagina!. And in no case, don`t laugh if you surprise him looking for his genitals. Also, psychologists say you don`t have to hasten him.
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The Age of Great Discoveries
Between 3 and 6 years old, the child will be more interested in the differences between the girls and boys with whom they play or spend time at kindergarten. Now it`s the time when he`ll want to know how his sexual organs work. So you may surprise him playing with his hand in his pants. He doesn`t do anything wrong. In the end, the little ones accept their sex and start to define mentally and socially through sex.
During this time, you should be ready to answer correctly as any question he may have. On the other hand, it would be appropriate to remind him that it`s not a good idea to talk about sexuality in public, because they are intimate subjects and should be discussed only with close people.
It`s important to tell him that no one is allowed at this age to touch him in his intimate areas. Also, tell him that if such incidents may occur, he should tell you immediately.
Before the age of 2, the child might not be able to make sentences, but he already knows where his genitals are.
Now He Knows
Between 7 and 10 years, the child knows how babies appear. If he didn`t find out from his parents, he definitely learned from friends or school. At this particular age, he starts to be frustrated with his own sexuality. Don`t worry, it`s completely normal! For this reason, your conversations about sex should be simple – to the point – and with enough information that will protect him in the future, for example, about STDs. – Learn more!
Of course, between these years, the child will be interested in each sexual organ in part and how it works. If you talk to him clearly, you`ll avoid a situation in which he may start to use bad words when talking about sex.
Most experts believe that after 7 – 8 years, parents need to explain to their children what it`s a condom and how it should be used. After 11 years they are allowed to buy them and after 15 – 16 years, no teenager should be without a condom in his pocket.
On the Way to Puberty
Between 11 and 12 years is the last chance to have a parent-to-child sex conversation before adolescence. For you, as parents, it`s the last train to prepare your child for a responsible sex life, if you have avoided this subject by now. And last but not least, to calm your child about the whole idea of sex.
The fat hormonal changes may scare your child or he may have feelings of embarrassment. Or he may often have the feeling of: “why this happens to me?’ This isn`t related to any real tragedy, but rather the appearance of breasts, menstruation or beard.
Warm discussions about the fact that everyone is going through this kind of chances and that nothing bad will happen can be reassuring for your child who will soon come out from a stage of his life. On the other hand, as sex talks are taboo in the family, the child may have a greater need to find out on his own about what sex actually means. – Find out more!
During this period, it`s important for the child to remember that he/she should be responsible for dealing with the opposite sex, if you clearly tell him what his responsibility actually means. There are 3 important things in these conversations:
- Sex doesn`t have to happen because of the pressure of another person or a group of friends. Everyone has the right to make their own decision about the onset of sexual life.
- Sex is a beautiful thing when it happens with someone you love or someone who shares your feeling.
- Sex can lead to illnesses, some of them fatal, so condom is mandatory.
No child is the same, however, there`s a tough road ahead and children should understand the importance of sex and everything that relates to it from as early as he`s able to understand the subject. When talking to your child about sex, be certain the discussion is age-appropriate.
Note: ONU demands the introduction of sex education as a mandatory field. This recommendation comes as a result of the fact that our country is at the top of a black top in terms of tasks among minors.