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What Parental Style Will You Approach?

All parents incorporate both love and limits in their parental style. There`s a balance between them, which determine a specific parental style.  Only the democratic education style has both love, strong points and inherent weaknesses in it, and it`s attribute to the important parental figures of our lives. These characters are usually our parents.

Parental Style

Parents who use their love as a parental, essential style (permissive parents) consider it to be more important than limits. They also use attachment and the connection with their child to teach them what is good and what is bad. They spend a lot of time with their children, communicate, negotiate and explain to them. Their value consist of “building their children`s trust” or “make them feel important.

Read more on Adopting a Child from Another Country: Domestic vs. International Adoption!

Parents who have limits as the base of their approached style (authoritarian parents) consider them to be more essential than love (relationship). They use external control to teach them what is good or bad, and they are quick in acting in a problem of discipline. Therefore, children are usually quick in reactions and they rarely negotiate with their parents. The value consists in “learning what respect is” and “providing structure.”

Table of Contents

What Are Parental Styles?

Parental styles are defined as a “manner in which parents express their beliefs about how to be better or worst parents.” All parents want to be good parents and avoid what they think would do a bad parent. They adopt styles learned from their parents, because they don`t know how else to behave and they feel this is the way they need to behave to be good parents.

Permissive Style

Parental control is very poor; therefore, the child receives full freedom, without clearly established limits, rules or responsibilities. Parents who adopt this parental style have a close relationship with their child, permanently showing their affection towards him. They don`t refuse his desires and don`t forbid his behaviors, which normally would need to be repaired. In such cases, parents are inconsistent (e.g. in one day the bedtime hour is 21.00, in another day is 23.00).

The child is used to negotiate the parent`s decisions and he constantly shows his discontent with them. Children raised by parents who adopt a permissive style are frequently characterized as “spoiled.” Parents confused the aggressiveness of their child with his affirmation (the popular reaction, “he has personality”) and the child learns to manipulate his parents. As adults, they`ll have problems in gaining autonomy and will experience emotional issues. Some children may remain dependent even during adulthood.

Careless Style

This style involves low levels of love and limits. In this case, parents consider as being inadequate to meet the children`s necessities. Sometimes it`s known as the “indifferent parental style,” due to lack of emotional involvement and control over the child. Parents and children in a family of this type are often engaged in vicious circles of interaction. An example of this type is the one that follows:

  • The parents tries to the child`s behavior through ineffective ways. For example, a parents may shout at the child to gather his toys or may threaten that he`ll put them to the garbage, if they aren`t gathered immediately.
  • As a response, the child ignores, protests or cries to his parents.
  • The parent stops to shout or threaten his child, and comes out of the situation. This action strengthens exactly the same thing that the parent tries to stop it, doing exactly what the child wants – to be left alone.
  • The child as, therefore, adopted a measure of control against the parent, because he assisted to the “withdrawal” scene from the parent`s side.
  • The conflict generates, therefore, parents push the stake higher and start to threaten and shout in a more serious manner (even physical abuse).
  • The child accepts in the end his parents` request of gathering his toys and strengthens the abusive behavior of this parents (parents feel the need to become angry or abusive in order to make the child submit). Or the child continues to refuse to cooperate, protesting even more, ignoring his parents and running away from home.
  • Parents give up or punish their child in a total frustration.

What is unique in the vicious circle is that this child also has a role to play in the interaction. Therefore, the child makes changes in his behavior to prevent the abusive reaction of his parents (gathers his toys). Parents often believe that by making their child to submit, no matter the methods used, the final result is justified.

Authoritative Style

The characteristics of authoritative parents are common for each of us. Still, although when you forbidden your child to go out to the club, for instance, you may think you want his best, when rather this may be interpreted as too much severity on your part. The way of how to be a parent cannot be strictly interpreted by definitions, but rather depending on the situation in which the parent manifests. You cannot say that a parent of a 12-year child is too severe if he doesn`t let him in the club, when this is a very suitable label for the parent of a 17 – 18-year child. Therefore, we need to give importance to the situation, before categorizing not only a parent, but any kind of person, depending on his reactions.

Read more on 4 Essential Baby Development Facts You Should Know!

The authoritative parent is characterized through an education that involves respect, order, discipline over the people that is afraid of; in this case, the authoritative parent. This is a follower of the law, “because that`s what it takes,” following a very strict pattern and avoiding as much as possible to get out of the pattern. This one asks the child to obey any rule imposed, without bringing explanations and without the possibility of being discussed.

One of the words that characterizes an authoritative parent is the answer to the question “Why?”, asked by his child: “Because I said so!” The parent doesn`t see why he needs to give an explanation to the child for what he asks and, generally, has a distant and detached attitude from him.

The authoritative parent tries to limit creativity, initiative and autonomy of a teenager, which often leads to interfamilial conflict, the adolescent being in the period when he tries to win his independence.

Democratic Style

The democratic style is based on democratic principles, such as “equality” or “trust.” It`s a balanced style, which combines parental styles and puts accent on the child`s rights. Usually, there`s a set of rules required for all the members of the family, so that the area of responsibility be broadened at family level. The parent who adopts this style is open to the child`s opinions and encourages his creativity, but at the same time puts accent on respecting the rules.

Unlike the authoritative stile, it`s logically argued and every rule is explained. This way, the child accepts the rules and completes the tasks in an effective manner. The need for security is covered, but at the same time the parent shows his trust in the child`s abilities and encourages him in taking decisions, teaching this way to become independent. As he becomes older, due to independence he`s given, the child will his own strengths, he`ll know to listen to other people`s opinions and consider them, respect the people around him, accept observations and different opinions and express his point of view freely. The ability of becoming aware of his own abilities will help him choose a job that suits him and fulfill his goals. – Click here!

A disadvantage of this style consist of the fact that a child raised this way will find it hard to adapt to an authoritative parental style that he may encounter in the day-to-day life (e.g. army, groups of friends, job, etc).

It`s generally accepted the fact that the democratic parental style presents compared to the rest of parental style when it comes to the further development of the child.

Protective Style

You can easily recognize a parent who is too protective, especially due to his apparently unjustified precautions and life ideology (“Not everything that flies can be eaten!”). A lot of times considered an ideal when it comes to parenting, the protective style is in a constant attention to the child, making from maternity and paternity a real job, to which parents dedicate themselves totally.

For the protective parent only the family is a safe place for his child, everything that belongs to the outside environment being a potential risk. That`s why, the first thing that the child will learn from such a parent will be to be cautious.

Protection is often exaggerated, parents being constantly stressed about “what could happen to their child.” You can recognize such a parent through victimization, when the child grows up and tends to “fly away” from the parent`s nest, through the agitation and tension that he feels when the teenager goes for a walk with his friends, through the popular expression “I`ve told you so!” or “How many times did I tell you to …?”.

Which is the Most Balanced Parental Style?

Put in front of the disadvantages and consequences of parental styles, parents might be distracted in making the correct decision. However, the best parental style is the democratic one in which the motto is “We are all equal!”

Having roots in the permissive style, the democratic style is characterized by respect for the child`s rights, however, without missing certain rules of behavior. The parent is protective, he offers security to the child, but without exceeding the limit of rational or not respecting the child`s needs or desires.

Of course, there are disadvantages here as well, but by comparison with other parental styles, they are very small. The child may adapt rather hard to a authoritative style, like school or job is, discussing the “orders” received by the professors or bosses, after the democratic model. Still the advantages as the inter-rational respect taught from childhood and freedom of speech of one`s opinions hinder immediately the disadvantages. In the end, a child raised after the democratic style will manage to get rid of all the issues involving adaptation.

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  431. Ernestsop June 24, 2023
  432. Ernestsop June 25, 2023
  433. Ernestsop June 25, 2023
  434. Jameswal June 26, 2023
  435. Ernestsop June 26, 2023
  436. LarryMex June 27, 2023
  437. Jamesasype June 27, 2023
  438. Jamesasype June 28, 2023
  439. JosephDok June 29, 2023
  440. Lutherdor June 30, 2023
  441. Jamesasype June 30, 2023
  442. Melicent June 30, 2023
  443. Nsmhorele June 30, 2023
  444. HppoPLUPS June 30, 2023
  445. lina June 30, 2023
  446. Emfladelt June 30, 2023
  447. NyuiProws June 30, 2023
  448. Emfladelt July 1, 2023
  449. EbcrArrek July 1, 2023
  450. NyuiProws July 1, 2023
  451. Onnyheive July 2, 2023
  452. Onnyheive July 2, 2023
  453. Clo July 2, 2023
  454. EbcrArrek July 2, 2023
  455. HppoPLUPS July 2, 2023
  456. EbcrArrek July 2, 2023
  457. Onnyheive July 2, 2023
  458. NyuiProws July 3, 2023
  459. Nsmhorele July 3, 2023
  460. HppoPLUPS July 3, 2023
  461. Nsmhorele July 3, 2023
  462. Nbtdorele July 3, 2023
  463. HbtxPLUPS July 4, 2023
  464. Eneladelt July 4, 2023
  465. NkriProws July 4, 2023
  466. Eneladelt July 4, 2023
  467. EvfxArrek July 4, 2023
  468. NkriProws July 4, 2023
  469. Ojefheive July 5, 2023
  470. CvxLthCrT July 5, 2023
  471. Ojefheive July 5, 2023
  472. HbtxPLUPS July 5, 2023
  473. EvfxArrek July 5, 2023
  474. Eneladelt July 5, 2023
  475. Ojefheive July 6, 2023
  476. NkriProws July 6, 2023
  477. HbtxPLUPS July 6, 2023
  478. Nbtdorele July 6, 2023
  479. Nbtdorele July 6, 2023
  480. Nmyrorele July 6, 2023
  481. NrtgProws July 7, 2023
  482. Ofvdheive July 8, 2023
  483. Ofvdheive July 8, 2023
  484. Ebfdadelt July 8, 2023
  485. Ofvdheive July 8, 2023
  486. NrtgProws July 9, 2023
  487. Nmyrorele July 9, 2023
  488. Nmyrorele July 9, 2023
  489. Enyfadelt July 9, 2023
  490. NhtgProws July 9, 2023
  491. Enyfadelt July 9, 2023
  492. EtjcArrek July 10, 2023
  493. NhtgProws July 10, 2023
  494. Ogrfheive July 10, 2023
  495. Ogrfheive July 10, 2023
  496. Rosaline July 11, 2023
  497. EtjcArrek July 11, 2023
  498. HbgdPLUPS July 11, 2023
  499. Enyfadelt July 11, 2023
  500. EtjcArrek July 11, 2023
  501. Nnscorele July 12, 2023
  502. HbgdPLUPS July 12, 2023
  503. Nnscorele July 12, 2023
  504. Nnolorele July 12, 2023
  505. HbgdPLUPS July 12, 2023
  506. Egmbadelt July 12, 2023
  507. NtvbProws July 12, 2023
  508. Egmbadelt July 12, 2023
  509. obIIBr July 13, 2023
  510. NtvbProws July 13, 2023
  511. Ovrcheive July 13, 2023
  512. Ovrcheive July 13, 2023
  513. EtjcArrek July 14, 2023
  514. HbgdPLUPS July 14, 2023
  515. Egmbadelt July 14, 2023
  516. EtjcArrek July 14, 2023
  517. Ovrcheive July 14, 2023
  518. NtvbProws July 14, 2023
  519. HbgdPLUPS July 15, 2023
  520. Nnolorele July 15, 2023
  521. Nnolorele July 15, 2023
  522. HbgdPLUPS July 18, 2023
  523. Egmbadelt July 18, 2023
  524. EtjcArrek July 18, 2023
  525. Ovrcheive July 19, 2023
  526. Ovrcheive July 19, 2023
  527. EtjcArrek July 19, 2023
  528. HbgdPLUPS July 19, 2023
  529. Nnolorele July 20, 2023
  530. EtjcArrek July 20, 2023
  531. Ovrcheive July 20, 2023
  532. NtvbProws July 20, 2023
  533. HbgdPLUPS July 20, 2023
  534. NtvbProws July 21, 2023
  535. NtvbProws July 22, 2023
  536. Nnolorele July 22, 2023
  537. Vejoift July 22, 2023
  538. Nnolorele July 28, 2023
  539. HbgdPLUPS July 28, 2023
  540. Egmbadelt July 28, 2023
  541. EtjcArrek July 29, 2023
  542. NtvbProws July 29, 2023
  543. Ovrcheive July 29, 2023
  544. Ovrcheive July 30, 2023
  545. EtjcArrek July 30, 2023
  546. HbgdPLUPS July 30, 2023
  547. Egmbadelt July 30, 2023
  548. EtjcArrek July 30, 2023
  549. Ovrcheive July 30, 2023
  550. NtvbProws July 31, 2023
  551. Nnolorele July 31, 2023
  552. Nnolorele July 31, 2023
  553. HbgdPLUPS July 31, 2023
  554. NtvbProws July 31, 2023
  555. HbgdPLUPS July 31, 2023
  556. Egmbadelt August 1, 2023
  557. Egmbadelt August 1, 2023
  558. EtjcArrek August 1, 2023
  559. NtvbProws August 1, 2023
  560. Ovrcheive August 2, 2023
  561. Ovrcheive August 2, 2023
  562. NtvbProws August 2, 2023
  563. EtjcArrek August 2, 2023
  564. HbgdPLUPS August 2, 2023
  565. Egmbadelt August 2, 2023
  566. EtjcArrek August 2, 2023
  567. Ovrcheive August 3, 2023
  568. HbgdPLUPS August 3, 2023
  569. Dereknon August 7, 2023
  570. Jimmykaply August 8, 2023
  571. AuOvyNc August 16, 2023
  572. Ocrtheive September 7, 2023
  573. Ocrtheive September 7, 2023
  574. Ocrtheive September 8, 2023
  575. Nbgcorele September 12, 2023
  576. NCrtnProws September 13, 2023
  577. Egmdbadelt September 13, 2023
  578. EnrcxArrek September 13, 2023
  579. Egmdbadelt September 13, 2023
  580. NCrtnProws September 13, 2023
  581. Oemgheive September 14, 2023
  582. EnrcxArrek September 14, 2023
  583. Oemgheive September 14, 2023